What I imagined to be like a wrestling match with my children – forceful, relentless, painful, uncomfortable etc. turned out to be pretty similar to that, sometimes even the kicking and screaming is quite on point I might add…
But, before we get into that, lets leap forward a little…
How often do we set our minds on what we want instead of what we need?
For example, perhaps it be something material like a car or an item of clothing; whereby we know that we can only afford X, yet we want Y, even though it’s perhaps out of our budget. It could even be something like buying a new house whereby we fall in love with one that isn’t as affordable as we’d like and then end up wrestling with the idea of buying it or not… which honestly speaking, just sucks right!?
Why should we have to choose and wrestle with all the pros and cons when we feel we deserve something, but don’t have the necessary means to get it?
It’s uncomfortable, often painful and disappointing because we don’t end up getting what we want, instead we end up settling for what we need.
Isn’t it the same with us spiritually? For example, when we want to do one thing, but God is saying “No” because it’s not the right time or perhaps, it’s not what He has called us to do at this time. Again, taking us through an uncomfortable and possibly disappointing process because we don’t get what we want – we only get what we need.
So, what do we end up doing? We either throw a tantrum, get upset and argue or wrestle with God about it? Only to come to the same realisation, that we are not always supposed to get what we want, but rather what we need; and that there is no one that knows this better than God Himself – the one who created us in His very own image. Genesis 1:27
The blessings, the growth and the plans that God has for us are limitless, if only, we just learn to stop wrestling with Him and trust Him. We can receive so much more if we ask God for what we need instead of what we in our human capacity want; and, more importantly, if we ask Him to share His vision and calling on our lives.
Take a moment and think about it.
Do you know why you are here?
Have you asked God what He wants you to do, or have you only asked Him for what you think He wants for you?
Perhaps, our starting point should be on our knees, talking to Jesus and taking the first step to invest in our future and the Kingdom of God by allowing God Himself to reveal to us our purpose and calling.
This is why I used the metaphor about wrestling with my children earlier, because in this case, I am the child and God is the parent wanting the best for his child. Get rid of your stubborn ways just as you want your children to and accept that God will give us what we need for this season. He is not ignoring the wants and desires in your heart, because it was Him that placed them there, but perhaps it’s just not that season yet.
As a mom, it hurts me that I can’t always give my children what they want – it’s just not possible, but they will always have what they need. Yes, this means a tantrum in the shop when I say no to a toy they already have at home; or no to a sweet because its dinner time soon; or perhaps even going as far as saying no to a playdate because in my heart it doesn’t feel right at the time. These are all things that my children won’t understand and will continue to wrestle with me upon until they either end up in tears and/or tantrums. They won’t understand now, I know that, but it still hurts me.
So, I can only imagine how God must have felt when I was asking Him for a baby of my own for so many years and He had to say no because it wasn’t the right time. He had to watch me cry on my knees, breakdown, get angry, throw a tantrum or 5 and cry some more. Until I learnt to trust Him completely, knowing that everything has its season and that this one with us trying to have a baby of our own, was one of learning that we don’t always get what we want, but only what we need. It wasn’t easy, it was just the opposite – uncomfortable, disappointing, painful, but in the same breath it meant growth. It meant trusting when I couldn’t see, hoping even when my heart was broken and having faith that was bigger than the mountains I was facing.
God will always have your best interests at heart, so when things aren’t going your way, perhaps you need to ask yourself if it is because you are not allowing God to make a way.
I want to end with Jeremiah 29:11 which is one of my favourite verses and has helped me many a day when I was wrestling with my own thoughts.
“ FOR I KNOW THE PLANS I HAVE FOR YOU,” declares the Lord, “ Plans to PROSPER you and not to harm you, plans to give you HOPE and a FUTURE.”
Stay blessed dear readers, and know that even in the deepest darkest valleys, Gods spirit cannot be extinguished.
All my love,
Nats
xoxo
