When you look at me from the outside, you may see someone who is all fine, and generally together (most of the time). Just by looking at me on the outside, it does not give you an indication of my struggles, my thoughts and the weeds that I am contending with to live life fully.
Some of us can try to hide our weeds and cover them up. Some of us don’t know they exist because we don’t want to acknowledge them but rather want to bury our head in the sand. For some of us we may put way too many weeds on ourselves than we deserve.
What could these weeds be in our lives? Is it:*shame *guilt *hurt * disappointment *low self-esteem/self-worth * lies * bad/toxic relationships *addictions *loss *control or lack of it *abuse *fear *anxiety *inadequacies.
How can we bloom when we surrounded by the weeds?
Get rid of the weeds all at once, trying to sort out everything that is bringing you down. However, thus is not going to be as simple as just tossing the weeds and getting rid of them, it’s a process. Dealing with everything all at once can be overwhelming and can often create more weeds in itself.
You could choose to leave the weeds there entirely and just cover them up. Yes sure, no one will know, but after time I am sure people will notice because somewhere there is going to be a crack. Just because you hide your weeds well, it does not mean that they are not there.
You could choose to weed them one at a time, slowly and thoroughly working through them so that you can weed it out of your life.
With the loss of my husband, I have had a lot weeds growing, loneliness, anxiety, inadequacies and fears, to name a few.
I have never really suffered from anxiety or depression growing up, although I had moments of it but it wasn’t something I struggled with naturally. Genuinely I have always been a positive person and looked on the brighter side of life.
After his death, I felt like I couldn’t parent on my own or couldn’t support my girls on my own. To be honest how could I do anything on my own really. It wasn’t until I had an encounter with the Holy Spirit again and He swept over my heart and healed me from my anxiety and fears.
In saying I was healed from it, I was, but it didn’t mean that it didn’t come knocking at my door again. The devil knows our weak spots and he is going to use them time and time again to bring us down and knock us off our feet. When he comes knocking, I keep saying I am healed! I keep speaking the positive so that I can truly walk in it.
It is often fear, anxiety, inadequacies etc. that keep us from blooming. They hold us back and immobilise us. Just because we are able to bloom, it does not mean that our circumstances have changed or that the hurt is no longer there.
We need to tackle the weeds in our lives, knowing that God is our biggest cheerleader, cheering us on. GOD IS OUR BIGGEST CHEERLEADER! He is backing us up always!
He is for us and not against us and wants us to live in freedom and to live fully focused and invested in Him and what He calls us to do, despite our lack, our abilities, our not good enough. We are never going to be good enough or even enough, but thankfully God calls us to His works as we are, in our weakness. We are more than capable because of Him.
I want to say that just because we have weeds in our lives, we all do, it does not mean that we are invalid or not capable of doing what God has called us to. He uses us as we are! The closer we draw to Him, the more He will equip us to deal with our weeds in our life.
Keep seeking Him and keep drawing near to Him, despite your weeds. He loves me as I am, and He loves you as you are!
Love your sister, Jess
